Friday Five: Pirates
In the grand world of Internet culture there is an ongoing war between between sea-faring ruffians and stealthy assassins. The debate has raged for a long time with no clear cut winner on either side. But your good friend murf has picked a side in this epic battle. For he supports those who like to buckle some swash! That’s right, murf is a pirate man! YARRR!!! Fifteen men on dead man’s chest and all that jargon that be said by pirates. Arr! So ya, today I’ll be talking about my favorite fictional pirates across a multitude of multimedia. So grab your rum and rapier, hoist the Jolly Roger and join me on deck to see my selection of superb swashbucklers!
Captain Jack Sparrow
Capt. Jack Sparrow
Did you seriously not expect the lovable Captain Jack to make this list? Absurd I tell you. Preposterous even. Disney’s blockbuster Pirates of the Caribbean films may not be the best films ever, but there certainly is lot of fun to be had particular with their signature rogue Jack Sparrow who is masterfully played by Johnny Depp. Jack is easily one of the most memorable new film characters in recent history and quickly wormed his way into our hearts with his scalawag antics. Aloof, mysterious and all around fun. Jack plays the comic relief to the straight-man of Will Turner, and does so well he eclipses just about every one else on screen, though Geoffrey Rush’s Barbossa give Jack a good run for his money. All-in-all, Jack is just fun and is easily one of the best sea-based brigand’s to grace the silver screen. Savvy?
Guybrush Threepwood
Guybrush Threepwood
There was a time when LucasArts was associated with more than Star Wars games, and they were single-handedly the greatest masters of the “Graphic Adventure” genre ever. And Ron Gilbert’s The Secret of Monkey Islandand its sequels are easily among the most recognizable games of the genre. What truly makes the series shine is the lovably inept hero: Guybrush Threepwood, Mighty Pirate™. Guybrush is a remarkable goof with hardly any penchant for pirating but remains undaunted in his pursuit to be one. Through a series of missteps, mishaps, mistakes and misadventures Guybrush gets the girl of his dreams Elaine Marley, defeats his arch-nemsis the Ghost/Zombie/Demon pirate LeChuck numerous times, and spouts out ridiculous and absurd dialog doing so. Over time he gets more “piratey” but for the most part remains the same inept goof through a series of adventures worth checking out for a good time. And for the record: “You fight like a cow!”
Dread Pirate Roberts
Dread Pirate Roberts
Ah, The Princess Bride. What geek doesn’t love this movie? It has everything! Fencing, adventure, miracles, death, true love and kissing! Truly a great film with an amazing cast. However, the early portions of the film feature “The Man in Black” who is later revealed to the “Dread Pirate Roberts” who is later revealed to be Buttercup’s true love Westley. Who before was a lowly farm boy is now a master fencer, can combat a giant and fearlessly go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line. We later learn how the title “Dread Pirate Roberts” is passed along in a sort of master/apprentice method where the previous “Roberts” will get rich enough from his plundering and will choose a successor and train him and then let him take over the role. Dashing, mysterious and really good with a sword. A pirate who truly exemplifies the very essence of its own Errol Flynn inspiration.
The Crimson Binome: Captain Capacitor
Captain Capacitor, The Crimson Binome
I’m gonna be honest. It’s been a really long time since I’ve seen ReBoot and I have some trouble remembering much about this character’s motives and personality. The reason I’ve put him on the list is really because I’m a fun of good puns. He first shows up in a Season 1 episode where he and his crew and introduced as “software pirates” who steal data and other assorted bits from any computer system they land in. They are later reintroduced by way of being able to help the grown-up Enzo Matrix back to Mainframe through the treacherous “web.” But yea. Literal “software pirates.” Makes me smile even if I can’t remember much about them.
The Strawhat Pirates
The Strawhat Pirates
It may be cheating to include a whole CREW of pirates, but if I didn’t this whole list would be as unbalanced and lopsided as my E3 2011 article from last week. The Strawhat pirates are the misfit crew from Eiichiro Oda’s long standing manga masterpiece: One Piece. From the manga’s inception in 1997 to today, One Piece has become, and continues to be, the best selling manga in history, even eclipsing Oda’s own inspiration Dragonball. One Piece follows the adventures of Captain Monkey D. Luffy and his oddball crew which includes a swordsman that uses 3 swords, a money-grubbing navigator, a cowardly lying marksman, a chef who only fights with his feet, a reindeer/human hybrid doctor, an archaeologist who can sprout parts of her body like flowers, a cyborg shipwright and a skeleton musician with an afro. They aren’t your typical pirates in that they are more on the seas for adventure than for pillaging and plundering. Each member has a different dream or goal and the drive and desire to achieve it and is unique, interesting, entertaining and most of the fun of the series comes from watching the crew go about their adventure and their interactions with each other. They are family in a sense, where each one fulfills a role and they care about and love each other. And even though their captain is a complete imbecile, he is strong, brave, loyal and will defend his friends to the very last. What makes One Piece work so well is that it while it is still a Japanese series with much of what one expects from manga tropes, it paves its way on a rolling wave of originality. From its unique character designs, to its absurd concept of “devil fruit” powers and its epic story and amazing characters, it is truly a great series. It doesn’t look like any other manga, it doesn’t act like any other manga and in every sense of the word is probably one of the most original series to come out of Japan. If you can sit through over 600 chapters of manga or over 500 episodes of the anime, perhaps you too will learn that one of the greatest pirates ever is a goofy kid with a cheesy grin and a straw hat and grand love for adventure.
For those of you who caught it on TV a few years back, I say don’t let that be your guide. It was a horribly butchered dub by 4Kids. Read the manga, watch the original Japanese version of the anime or the new dub by FUNimation (partially available on online streaming). Those are MUCH better representations of what the series is all about and can be like. And while you can really pick it up almost anywhere, it is one of those series where the best place to start is the beginning.
[The Friday Five is murf's weekly series on GeekLore. If you enjoyed this article, and want to see more geeky goodness from murf and others, please check out www.geeklore.net.]
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